| for family |
[Sep. 4th, 2006|02:55 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  annoyed | ] |
ok so i just found out my family has been reading this.. thats fine.. i have nothing to be ashamed of.
Yes i have been through depression and hurt myself - No. I do not do it now.
Yes i have tried drugs - Once again No i don't do them anymore.
Yes i have had sex - Well obviously i have a child don't I?
Whateva guy's I'm really not bothered what my family thinks of me after they have judged me because i thort family didn't judge .. i thort we loved eachother no matter what and were always there for eachother.. so ball is in all of your courts...
I am sorry if these things hurt anyone.. but it's not who i am now and i didnt mean to hurt people by doing it. But at the end of the day my past has made me the person i am now, I'm a happy healthy mummy and i wouldnt have life any other way.
Love you All.
-sarah |
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| Maxi! -- so cool i have no words for it! i love Max! |
[Aug. 16th, 2006|09:38 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  indescribable | ] |
Heloooo People!
just a lil note to say today Max had his first shower! and it was sooo cute :P he was enjoying it so much he done his first proper giggle! 15 weeks old and his first shower and giggle... so sweet!
When i first put him under the shower he done a hugeeee smile! then i soaped him up and he done the giggle! then i was washing his hair n he nuzzled into my boobie n fell asleep haha :P typical boy!
he's really holding his bottle himself now, he still cant tilt it up enough but he always grips with 2 hands! unless he just wakes up then thats an exception :P
well thats is all for now :)
love yas!
-sezzy |
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| piX |
[Aug. 14th, 2006|12:18 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  flirty | ] |
this is me n becci looking hot on saturday night :) love ya becci |
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| Pictures of emily and max :) |
[Aug. 13th, 2006|10:07 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  amused | ] |
haha! My little man Max had a sleep over at aunty sezzy's on friday and hung out with Little miss Emily. Sarah took some photo's so here they are! keep an eye out for sumthing funny! :P (told you he's a ladies man people!!)
haha find it? :P |
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| PiX |
[Aug. 10th, 2006|03:48 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  enthralled | ] |
This is Me and Becci befor a big night out! Becci is my best friend and a great chick! Love you Becci Boo! |
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| Max! |
[Aug. 10th, 2006|03:27 am] |
This is my little man MaX! :) I done his hair the other day hehehe :P |
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| another crappy song .. |
[Aug. 9th, 2006|01:23 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  sad | ] |
i just realised song writting makes u feel what you already know..
I just wrote a song for ben (the ex & father of my child) and i sung it on the fone for him.. all he could say was "that was beautiful" with a sob..
For Ben
some times i wonder what your doing at night
then i think ...i dont care
some times i wonder why all we did was fight
its because ... you wernt there
always leaving me alone at night!
only coming home to start a fight!
not answering calls even tho i was so close..
always letting me sit there in fright!
tell me im stupid coz all i did was try
what were you doing with those hoes?
who knows..
But im over it im over you
couldnt care anymore what you do
make a mess of your life and tell me that there aint no more lies
i dont care either way
im not listening to you
i dont care what you say
Im not falling back in love with you..
i was having your baby..
having ur boy!
i was almost in labour
but u were fucking ur toy.
whats her name ?
does she love you?
was it worth what we went thro?
i love you ben i always will
you pulled me thro when i was ill
you gave me the gift of life
and i love you for all eternity..
you will always be a part of me....
in writting this i know im not ready to move on
but i know in the end it will make me strong,
thinking of you with everyone else..
people holding my baby
ones who you know i hate
ive told you how i felt.
that's all so far.. no ending. maybe that will come when i have some closure on that chapter of my life.
love sezzi |
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|
| maxim00 |
[Aug. 4th, 2006|12:43 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  accomplished | ] |
hey hey
well i thort i would update this as i have some news!
My little man (maX) has his first solid feed 3 days ago.. and he seems to be loving it! so that's cool haha
Ben has decided he dosnt want to see max this weekend, which is sad because i don't want him to push max away. But it seems that is what he is doing.. Nevermind.
-sez |
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| a song |
[Jul. 30th, 2006|11:20 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crap crap crapito! | ] |
I went on a bit of a tangent last night writting this is one of the 5 songs i wrote.. yep their all crappy like this one. haha.
Over You
Randon pages,
empty words.
I fill this journal,
with words of hurt.
You make me feel lonely,
Dirty and used.
I'm sick of listening to your abuse.
Get out!
I'm tired of this shit.
Get out!
It won't go away with another hit.
Get out!
I can't take it anymore.
Get out!
Walk out this door!
You tell me you love me,
Tell me I'm your's.
Then you use me, abuse me
Like I'm just some whore.
You've cheated on me,
and everyone else.
Karma will catch you,
You will see how I felt.
Get out!
I'm not your whore.
Get out!
I refuse to take anymore.
Get out!
These cuts aren’t for you.
Get out!
Before I find out something new.
These words aren’t of hate,
Their just what you deserve.
I've grown up now,
You can't hurt me,
I'm not in lurv.
I let you get away with it too long,
But now I'm grown I'm getting strong.
I know now I can say NO!
I'm not to be used,
I am not a hoe.
You took advantage,
Me on my knee's.
I don't care anymore,
Just listen please..
Get out!
I'm not your whore.
Get out!
I WON'T take it anymore.
Get out!
You're just a sleeze
Do me a favour if you please...
Fuck Off.
By -=Sezzy-T=- 2006
goodnight! |
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|
| a catch up entry |
[Jul. 24th, 2006|08:31 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| |  artistic | ] |
wow! so much has happened since i had my little Max, He is 3 months in 2 days! he's smiling and playing with his little soft farm house its so great! I love my little man :)
Ben and I are no longer, i finally got the courage to goto the police.. and i no longer live in Armadale *thank god* haha.
I am offically a godmother! Little Emily will be a punker in no time :P she's a gorgeous lil gurl.. Must be the spawn of Sezzy thing coz we both have gorgeous kids! even if i do say so myself haha.
i wrote a little poem for my boy so i might put it on here
When they put you in my arms,
words could not explain,
how much i could ever love you,
and how special was this day.
your almost 3 months now
and your getting so strong.
you play and smile with your mummy,
in my eye's you could never do wrong.
your mummy and daddy love you,
and i never want you to forget
make your dreams come true
never live in regret.
you're my beautiful little man and your mummy loves you!!!
anywho.. i just want to say a big thanks to Sarah for all your help with the breakup and everything you're an awsum chick and i love you! and thankyou for giving me the oppotunity to be a god mother! you'll be one soon to young Maximus! haha sucker :P your turn to stand infront of church haha.
i'll update this a bit more often now..
love yah's!
-sezzy |
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| (no subject) |
[May. 19th, 2006|07:26 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] |
wow havnt seen the likes of LJ for a while..
I HAVE A BEAUTIFUL BABY BOY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
born at 11am on the 03/05/06
he weighed in at 7 pound 15 ounces and 53cms tall with a full head of hair :P
oh so beautiful..:P
ill post pics and stuff soon
-sezzi |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 29th, 2005|10:35 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | happy | ] |
Heya!
Well, today my parents left.. again. haha.
Ive been up since 5am stressing i would sleep in n not say goodbye :| *weirdo*!
Tonight im going to a halloween partay! and dressing my belly up too hehe gotta start bubs young i fink :P
im going as a devil (oh so origanal haha) I'm wearingggg, a black skimy dress with red fishnet stockings and horns and a p0ker! :P and under the dress im wearing a boobtube that says "satans my bitch" that I made for bubs! hahaha! :P
My cousin and his gf came out from england a few days ago so thats kewl :) get to goto places i havnt been since school haha like the z00 and underwaterworld n stuff yay!
and do you beleive in rock n roll can music save ur mortel soul? (blah blah blahh) haha i love this song *dancez about*
im a bit hypo thismorning, i think it's coz the morning sickness is overrr *touch wood*
and im excited about tonight! hehehehe :)
I'm making a punch (not for me for other peoples) and im soaking fruit in half a bottle of vodka and a bottle of passion p0p atm *eeeK* I couldnt even without feeling tipsy hahaha. It's at our (ben and I) friends place Michelle and she has 2 daughters nicole and jen hahaha there only 13 & 14 so i figure they will drink it if no one else does :P hahaha!
anywho gunna cut it short *mwaaaaaa* bens going to be up soon haha
-sezzi and splodge (who is getting FAT in my belly) |
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| A BaBy SeZzZy!! |
[Sep. 13th, 2005|07:14 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | excited | ] |
hey hey people!
well just a little note to say, I'm Pregnant :) !!
8 weeks anddd counting!
very exciting stuff coz I have a good feeling this time :):):)
and yes I'm keeping it!! so don't bother asking like Nathan. haha cock.
-luv yaz
sezzi |
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| 6:20 am .. why oh whyy am i awake? |
[Jul. 17th, 2005|06:20 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | calm | ] |
hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii people!!!!
i have my belly dancing concert tomorrow night yays!! (technically tonight but whose tenchnical b4 mid day?)
I think watto hates me..
at wattos party my boyfriend Ben got a little too drunk and started a bit of a tiff.. no matter how many times he says sorry it still isnt good enough but hey.. that's life i suppose..
after the huffla (belly dancing) i dont think tara and ronnie are going to be going back.. that means ill have no group... which means i wont be going either.. which is a shame.. i was really starting to enjoy it..
ben used to come up every week and he was our like... mascott if you like.. but after wattos party watto said he wasnt aloud to go.. us girls were lost without him.. like it just wasnt the same ayy.. We all said that, not just me. The last proper practice b4 the huffla and watto said he couldnt go.. wasnt really punishing ben but was punishing us girls.. oh well such is life.
yesterday we had practise at the hall (ben didnt come to that either) he stayed around with John (taras man) and cleaned up and stuff hehe anyway back to the practise haha. We were the second dance, we were soo nervous and there were fuck all people there.. but we will be right at the huffla. After the practice at the hall we went back to taras place and had a few beers and ronnie came over and we practiced our dances over and over..
we done really well i hope we dont fuck it up.. we should do really well.. our outfits look awsum!! we have great colours that all come togeather well.. :):):)
anywho enough of dancing talk!!
lastnight me and ben when we got home from tara's me n ben had a few d's and beers and we havnt stopped talking it's been awsum.. like not high but feeling chatting and really well.. :) I love benjamin!! :):)
going back down south on wednesday
got bulk orders sitting there to do..
Tonight me and ben were talking about my parentals..
I just dont really think they realise how much they both mean to me like.. if anything happened to either of them, i'd be utterly lost..
Like me and my dad when i was growing up we just clashed so much and we very rarely could have a conversation without fighting.. but since i moved out.. we have really become so close.. like when he hurt himself and i had to get him upto the hospital i was soooo fucking scared he had had a stroke or somthing but in the end he was fine *thank god - amen* but like that day made me realise how important family really is..
My great uncle Les died on friday - he had a series of heart attacks but heaven is a better place.. it's very sad that uncle les had to past away when the world is just an awful place .. with the bombs in england and everything.. it's just sad..
God Bless You Great Uncle Les :)
anyways im going to cruise.. Love ya's!
*mwa*
-sezzi |
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| yes well.. i think im going CRAZY people!!! *giggles likes a lil skool gurl* |
[Jun. 28th, 2005|04:13 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | giggly | ] |
| [ | music |
| | whatevaaa comes in my head at the timeeee.... | ] |
sooooooooooooooooo
it's been 2 days since my last orgasm ... i mean confession! yes confession!
not been up to much, got a job yesterday which was pretty frikkin gr00vayy haha..
belly dancing tomorrow tonight... hmm.. ok technically tonight but whose being technical at 4am hmm? well if it's you you're a nerd!! a nerd i tells you!! yes.. that means you...
Watto started his LJ again!! wooohooo!! watto is my favourite :):):):)
soo I hear jackie has had her baby.. yeh.. woop woop hahaha. i know of 3 guy's (so far) fearing it's theres. pretty fucking shocking.. but hey! :)
im a little nympho
sexc.. andd... cute !
here are my titties
feel free to sh00t ;)
when i get all worked up then i shout
bend me over eat me out
*runs around the house singing "i am so great i am so great you all suck balls you all suck balls lar di dar di dar! lar di dar di dar!"*
*clears throat*
no one even reads this anyway.. so why do i bother... hmm tiz not as if it's effort or anything i spose! hehe yay! no effort! ...yes.. well.. *clears throat again*
im in a weirddd mood ay...
i think i have cravings for pizza.. but it could be for frozen peas... im so confused :(
WHYYYYYY MEEEEEE WHYYYY DO I GET WEIRD CRAVINGS AT STUPID HOURS OF THE MORNINGGG... WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!
brb....
ok back... i figured out what the craving was...
FAIRY BREAD!!!! WOOOHOOO!!!!
im on a diet tho.. and this diet means i cant eat butter so uhh.. im rolling sprinkles in bread .... seemed like a good idea at the time but now that i see half the sprinkles down my boobies i dunno if it was.... *ponders* and i think butter might even be healthyer than 100's and 1000's so ... buh! i dunnooo... im feeling a bit blonde at the moment ...
3 6 9 the goose drank wineee
the monkey chewed tobacco on the street sidelinee
the line broke
the monkey got choked
and they all went to heven in a little roe boat
*clap clap*
hahaha my daddy used to sing that to me when i was little... i thort it was sad coz the monkey died but i think im over that now...maybe.. *sobs*...
and who say's a PiXeE cant be a DJ:
what if god was one of us
just a slob like one of us
just a stranger on the bus
trying to make his way home..
isnt it ironic...
dont you think?
a little... too ironic
yeah, i really do think
du ... du hust... du hust mish
i wanna fuck you like an animalll
i wanna feel you on the insideee
i love you
you love me
barney gave me HIV
sugar high !!
dontt go chasing waterfalls
please stick to the rivers and the lakes that your used too
take my moneyyy
take my possetion
take my obsession
i dont need that shit!
twinkle twinkle little starrrr
how i wonder what you areee
chocolate starfish!
and the hotdog flavoured water!
theee endddd.
woahhh .. im being a litttle random...
whats new hmm?
nuh im never this random am i?
i dont think so..
dobedobedooo...
i think this would be the most random and the longest entry ive dun...
strangeeeee....
well it's not really strange.. but .. it's odd what these ungodly hours of the morning do to a young girl...i think anyway.. maybe boys too.. lets not discriminate :P
i might go b4 sumthing unbeleivably random slips.. like.. IM A LESBIAN!.. no no.. not really :)
could be. you never know. a girl asked me out today haha.
i feel like icecream...
and a milkshake...
mmmmmm milkshakesssss...
gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooodddddddnight! :)
*mwa* -sezzi |
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| .....bored rambles. |
[Jun. 24th, 2005|03:25 am] |
| [ | mood |
| |  blank | ] |
| [ | music |
| | alanis morisette t00ns | ] |
im up at a stupid hour, but what's new?
i just slept with the ex, now we're sitting here talking about some other chicks he's fucked.. woohooo what a night. :|:|:|
but he just told me he's not my ex he's my best friend.. so oviously that justifies it haha. MEN! cant live with them cant live without em (unless you have an impressive toy box like mine) hahaha :P
not really complaining .. it was great sex haha :P MY DROUGHT IS OVER!! IT'S BEEN A DAY! THANK FUCK THATS OVER.
sooo.. world peace rocks WOO!
haha hippy chick music is good for you..
*dobedobedooooo*
ok thats all..
-sezzi *mwaaaa* |
|
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 19th, 2005|11:45 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
Would just like to say Welcome!to my friend David, who i finally convinced to start a LJ hehe !!! YaYz! |
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| it's all for zee m00se |
[Jun. 19th, 2005|09:13 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | crazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | *m00se noises* | ] |
OK so here is the mooses mention haha
SomeGuyInABikini says:
Don't forget about zee moose! *Makes a moosey noise*
SomeGuyInABikini says:
nonononononononono! You can NOT forget zee moose! It's imperitive you remember zee moose!!!
god damn the moose i say!! damnnnn theeee mooooseeee!!!!
Meh we all have to have a fetish i spose :P *pets wayne*
PiXeE`ShiT says:
anything else you want bout the moose on der?
SomeGuyInABikini says:
moose and how Maddy can't make moose without an electric beater and how a fork just doesn't cut it!!!
SomeGuyInABikini says:
or you can make moosey noises
so there u have it :P:P:P:P:P:P
*mwa*
-sezzi |
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| RaR! |
[Jun. 18th, 2005|10:17 am] |
| [ | mood |
| | lazy | ] |
woah it's been a while but ive decided to make tme today to.. uhh.. ermm.. Reflect? haha
I havnt been doing much..
BellyDancing is going really well.. and im doing drumming at the moment too so yeah that's fun :)
Basketball is Great FuN! I got the first Tech foul for our team haha I swear I should win an award for it :P
I'm living in a bit of a z00 atm, my house has been taken over
There's still me and Samantha just we have Ben and my brother too PLUSSS there bf's/gf's argh!!
Oh well I finally got quiet time today, Sams at her boyfriends, my bros at his gf's and bens helping sumone fix a car? haha that should keep him occupied :P
I leave for england in september, tickets are booked! YaYs
still no job
thats pooi
but meh :)
the other night Ben and I were bored we were singing this on repeat haha
gimme a home among the mull trees
with lots of bongs please
an trip or two and a flaggin of goon
buckets out the back
smokes out the front
and an old geminiiiiiiii
BeNNo & SeZZi -=05=-
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT RocK ` n ` RoLL \m/
haha yes anywho :P
wattos party soon! woot! Been seeing alot of watto lately
always seem to be hanging out n stuphs so yeah sweet
NeWaYs! i'll be back sooner rather than later next time i promise :P *mwaaaaa*!!!
-Love always -sezzi- |
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| *shrug* |
[May. 1st, 2005|05:52 pm] |
| [ | mood |
| | bored | ] |
RaR i'm so bored
Tiz sunday, whats there to do on a sunday? not much i say! so im doing fucking washing n chatting online.. w00p w00p....
Lastnight I piked so fucking early ay.. it was a really poor effort.. im rather disapointed with myself.. but i wasnt feeling well so i guess it's oooo kayyyyy. Maybe.
LiL CaTe is LuRvly! coz i say so.
*shakes her bum* Belly Dancing on tuesday.. dunno if i should go or not... MaYbe!
ok ima go .. do sumthing other than bum on the net.. yep, sounds like a plan
*mwa*
lovesya
-sezzi |
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